It began with a song known as the Second to Last Song ever composed by Oliver Songbringer. Two score voices unlocked the key to one of the biggest mysteries of Ashbury's history: The Talon Scrolls.
Earlier this month, deep within the Archives of the Bardic College, a series of previously unknown transcripts created by the first Duke of Ashbury were discovered containing immense amounts of information chronicling the First War of Fangthorn. Whereas information up until this point has been generally sparse, these reference materials were crisp, clear, and concise. A special committee of historians has been spending day and night assessing these important documents and the following are some of the brief passages from Oliver's notes.
Although most of the other aspects of these diaries are still being examined, there are strange distortions around many of the areas of history Oliver is said to have documented. Until these are properly clarified, the College is unable to reveal them to those outside per orders from Oliver himself; however, some revelations have been already made.
This first entry is crystal clear however and it was prepared to be passed onto the citizens from beyond the graveyards. Here then are the words of Oliver Songbringer:
After the final battle with Fangthorn, I was nominated Lord of the Four peoples by the members of four of Ashbury's most prolific racial figures. After much arguing over the shattering of Fangthorn's spirit, they reluctantly nominated me with the unswaying support of the Hoblings and the Dwarves.
Perhaps what has yet to be revealed is what occurred to me once the ceremony was completed. I was assaulted by an order being calling itself Ozymandius. Swept through a rift with this being, I was transported to a place called Tamerlane, an apparent museum of sorts.
Dragged through a corridor of dazzling artifacts, I was placed within some strange sort of Amphitheater where eight Order Lords interrogated me over the use of the Talon Scrolls that had fallen into my possession through my father's research. Angered at my "misuse" of the rituals Greater Proscribe and Spirit Shatter in particular, they sentenced me to obliteration for my crimes.
Unable to tolerate such disrespect to a man who had saved his people, I argued with them for many hours, but with little success. Apparently they could not locate the Talon Scrolls as I had them well hidden. Perhaps this is why my friend Morganna could not locate them; however this one thing remained my sole bargaining chip with the elementals for my own life.
Concerned that time would irrevocably be altered without my presence in the Duchy during its critical time of founding, I offered to turn the scrolls over to Tamerlane in exchange for my life. They commuted two of the deaths after I revealed the location of the Talon Scrolls, and then they executed me. I returned to Ashbury via the Healer's Guild Circle and was resurrected successfully by a young gypsy healer who served as Adora Mitland's assistant. From this point I did my absolute best to ignore the information imparted to me so that I could keep the history of our Duchy on track. Perhaps my actions have altered rather than healed the wounds created by the travelers whom I have encountered.
One interesting addition to my life has to have been a later encounter at the Way Station with a being known as Brimstone. Seemingly a plant within the midst of the Tamerlane caretakers, Brimstone is one of their leading "acquirers" of items they deem too powerful for mortal hands. In exchange for important information, he has secured for me the Box of Paradoxes, allowing the last loose end to be tied in this whole matter. It will take me many years to learn how to use it and I have several ideas on how to prepare it so it can be found somewhere in the distant future.
Strangely enough, this may lend researchers some information as to the strange "Time of Madness" associated with the so called "Wizard's War" between Fangthorn and Oliver Songbringer, a time in which it is said that many in the Royal Army acted completely unlike their personalities and exhibited strange character quirks.
Reports have confirmed that a cherished fragment of Oliver Songbringer's unfinished work has disappeared from its vault, assumedly stolen by the likes of a Jhivantane bard named Ystus_this likely led to a group of adventurers to follow the song and locate the "Box of Paradoxes." Remember this is only a theory, but some have confirmed this story.
The following fragments of historical references (which are strangely cataloged to the present day, far beyond the day of Oliver Songbringer's death) have managed to be salvaged from the document:
After the song was completed, a great mist formed around Ashbury transporting several individuals to the final scene of the drama of the First Fangthorn War. As Brimstone informed me, the three Arbiters apparently appeared and did their best to prevent paradoxes from occurring by using a great beast to discipline those they noticed changing the time stream, although I could not see them. This was an unfortunate after affect, as I obviously wanted at first to have the time stream changed. I have learned my error in doing this, and I will forever be damned for it. My entire life has been dedicated to making up for this one error in judgement.
When my charges first arrived, they appeared within the bodies of individuals in the newly formed 7th Infantry, the Doomgrinders. Placed in six companies, they were ordered according to their battle experience.
The elite citizens from the future formed the Company of the Rising Phoenix led by a hobling named Aloryn. From this group I met a remarkable man named Hanson. Although he pestered me incessantly for magical boons, his heart was dedicated to preventing changes in history. In particular, one of the Arbiters calling himself Dynamic attempted to change history as much as possible and even distributed among the time travellers books of magic from their own time. Hanson was instrumental in preventing these books from falling into the hands of citizens from the past.
The other elite company was lead by a man calling himself Agnar, who I know to have appeared as Commander Dragonhart, a survivor of the massacre at Deathwatch. Among the veteran corps were the Red Shield Company and the True Bloods. Among the green recruits were the Shattered Dragons and the Fangkillers. Each individual company was introduced to many of the prolific personalties of the time such as Connor Arawyn, who appeared briefly to spur on the recruit's morale before moving to the western flank with his Company of the Storm to confront the legions of Bowelmuncher, the Chieftain of the Rockknuckle clans.
General Vaaladus Patton served to instruct the troops and tragically defied Queen Meriel's outlawing of necromancy during the war. It took weeks to get word back to her to determine that he had actually gone against her wishes, as he lied several times, saying he had been granted dispensation. A meeting with the elves of the Amani forest brought a confrontation which led to his admitting of guilt. His sentence was obliteration and his head was placed on a pike outside the gates of Ashbury as a warning to necromancers and those who defy the Queen.
Perhaps the most strange of the incidents that occurred were the experiments conducted by Dr. Theopolis Nathan Tolulene, the master of the Army's research and development group. Created in response to the Thrulls created by Fangthorn, the research and development charged Dr. Theopolis to create wondrous but often flawed items. Although his experiments usually failed, his rewards were great.
Some of the more spectacular failures had to be the doctor's amulet of celestial harnessing -- a poor attempt at granting a celestial pyramid to its user, it tended to summon meteors to strike the target rather than give any benefits. A traveler named Corrine DuFore of the True Bloods tested it once, and then one named Jonah Purus (of the Irregulars, a group of Scouts), both requiring Life spells. The Square of Power likewise worked poorly as it did not actually grant the user any air, and with all of the Rising Pheonix company crammed within it, air ran out quickly. Luckily it did manage to go down. The Running Wolves were the recipients of an alchemical repellent called "Troll Begone!" which, when tested on a pacifistic tribe of trolls, served not to repel them but enrage them.
The Fangkillers proved to be excellent sports and took Dr. Tolulene's "Happy Fun Golem" out for a test drive. In an effort to make a reflective golem, Theopolis used a new mixture called rubber to coat his golem. Its tremendous strength equal to 20 dagger blows in each arm however proved to be padded. Realizing this, Theopolis placed an enormous explosive bomb within its chest. The golem itself played a merrily little tune as the Fangkillers led it about the camp, and then Theopolis cleverly set its detonator to the negative vocabulary typical of trolls and the golem began to set itself whenever insulted. The Fangkillers deactivated it successfully several times with praise, love, and begging while Theopolis insulted it to test the trigger. Eventually the Golem was pushed over the edge with a fat joke and it exploded.
The last of Nathan's experiments was with intelligent weapons, and he endowed a magical weapon with a keen intellect! Unfortunately it whined and simpered, irritating anyone possessing it. It also screamed "thief!" whenever someone who was not a member of the Shattered Dragons Company carried it. Enoch proudly bore the brunt of its annoying complaints and utilized it in battle to good affect.
Adora Mitland, head of the Medical Contingent, the Quartermaster General, and Sir Arthur Capulus proved to be my bane -- carrying out a vile campaign of genocide against our troll opponents. It seemed that while many companies were dispatched to meeting Fangthorn's warlords, Adora and her cronies were dispatching our troops to conduct a war of no regrets upon Fangthorn's peoples. Several groups were dispatched to poison water and food supplies, kill noncombatants such as children and elderly, and Arthur, seeking revenge for his uncle's murder, attempted to burn down a troll library. I was frankly surprised they even had a library. Perhaps I misjudged them from the start. Perhaps we all have. Although three of our companies committed these atrocities, three justly refused to carry out these wicked deeds.
Adora Mitland and her allies were revealed by the Order of the Unlidded Eye, an ad hoc military organization responsible for intelligence. MI officers unraveled the scheme but Adora escaped sometime after the battle. For his actions, Arthur was executed and his body returned to the estate of Capulus to be enshrined by those troll hating fanatics we failed to catch.
My personal responsibility was to conduct missions of vital importance politically. I dispatched several missions critical to cementing our alliance with other powerful groups. The Shattered Dragons were sent to rescue Setkel, our liaison with the hoblings from his spy missions on the trolls. Setkel for years served as a double agent for us, plying the wine of his people to the trolls while serving us. They fortunately succeeded or the alliance would have crumbled after I shattered Fangthorn into shards.
The Fangkillers negotiated with the Yellowback goblins to encourage them to desert Fangthorn's forces; however several members of the "Trellheim Warrior Sect" murdered them by the dozens. It would have been a great blow to Fangthorn and would have aided our cause to use the Yellowbacks as laborers.
The Rising Pheonix however pulled off the most crucial mission, as I polymorphed and transformed some of their members to approach troll elders and encourage them to reveal Fangthorn's plans. We discovered how honorable the trolls were in their cause and that surprised us greatly.
Critical negotiations with the Sand Tigers held our northern front; however for some strange reason the barbarians became virulently sick after encountering my representatives (hours after they signed the critical treaty), and they have died by the thousands. I can only blame myself for the deaths of this proud tribe, as someone among the time travelers apparently had passed an epidemic into their ranks. One among the Ashbans of the future took up the mantle of the Sand Tigers, and since he was not within his own body, he was able to return to his time and hopefully will raise the Sand Tigers out of the ashes so they may walk the sands of western Trellheim once again.
In the darkness of the evening, I took much preparation responding to the evil which Fangthorn was assaulting us with. The true offensive came when Stumpmaker and his Nightwalker clan assaulted the town. With only one magic weapon available to us (in retrospect I should have made more), the town battled powerful undead trolls, twisted and animated to kill the living within the camp. The lack of investment in silver weapons by the Companies proved their undoing, as many of the lesser creatures that Fangthorn sent against us required silver weapons to hit. Whether by honor or by means Fangthorn granted only Stumpmaker, a powerful mummy and two cackling corpse body guards resisted all weapons accept magical ones. The brigade members fought valiantly, but many withdrew to fortifications and Stumpmaker fled when his minions were massacred.
Before the final assault by Fangthorn's forces, the elite "Sons of Fangthorn" (also known as the "Hammer") assaulted the town in a reconnaissance in force. Battered from constant fighting however, they were quickly overtaken by the companies and several of them permanently killed.
Many of the citizens and commanders gained advantage of the magic weapons that Fangthorn had created for his elite, and weapons fell into the hands just before Fangthorn arrived.
The last battle against Fangthorn surprised everyone, as he came forward under the flag of truce. Gunther Darnok, Warden of the Northern lands to the east of the Ash Forest, stepped forward with Loren Alfenwen, commander of the Amani elves, to greet Fangthorn as honorable adversaries. (Gunther served during the Wizard War with honor, but I am afraid he will forever hate me for my becoming Duke of Ashbury over him. The Songbringers and the Darnoks had long been friends for generations, and over the issue of Fangthorn he turned his back upon his family name and bastardized his title of "North Warden" into Nordenn and named the lands granted to him after his new family -- his people.)
Gunther (who had acquired a limp somewhere since last I had seen him), met Fangthorn with Loren and Arthur, and Fangthorn announced that the depredations against his people had been ended honorably and in many cases prevented and that he would in turn demonstrate the honor of his people by casting his last obliterate into the ground instead of using it on a soldier. To an ovation and beating of shields from the brigade, Fangthorn promised an honorable fight, and an exchange of prisoners of war. His troops would first aid the fallen in exchange for similar treatment of his troops.
Gunther agreed but Arthur Capulus, hater of anything trollish, attacked Fangthorn under the flag of truce. As Gunther moved to stop him, Fangthorn invoked the Gaseous Form of his enchanted weapon and returned to his forces.
Softening up our forces with the last of his trolls, some of them barely able to hold a sword, Adora and Arthur managed to kill some during the initial wave, but many of the soldiers also killed the troll warriors. Still remaining honorable, Fangthorn's next wave administered half of the death blows that our forces administered on them. Arthur was caught and executed on the field of battle for these continuous violations of the honor battle. After several more waves of grunts, Fangthorn finally appeared heading his elite bone troll children. As the lines faced off against each other, Fangthorn hurled a pantherghast and a chaos elemental lord directly into the rear of our lines. I summoned a fire elemental promptly in response. I also outfitted Hanson in the form of a bone golem for his actions for preserving history, but he was engulfed in a barrage of chaos burst from the elemental lord.
Stumpmaker stood by the side of his master, but seemed to absorb the healing magics thrown upon him and counteract all of the disarms thrown at him. Fangthorn also held off our forces by reversing his metabolism, absorbing countless gases and incapacitating spells.
Just as all Fangthorn's warriors were nearly eliminated, my nemesis created a horde of charnal juggernauts and began the battle anew. The troops fought long and hard and it was a member of the Rising Pheonix who activated an item given him by Doctor Theopolis which invoked a cursed spell upon Fangthorn's exhausted form and rained blows upon him, knocking the troll king unconscious.
Fangthorn was captured and the victory was ours!
In order to preserve the peace, this Dragon Mage had to be stopped. From the arcane pages of the Talon Scrolls, I summoned a Spirit Shatter, smashing Fangthorn into a thousand pieces and scattering them for miles. I then promptly invoked a Greater Proscribe against the trolls in the area, trapping them within the area in which we fought. I used this sorcery in the area so that no troll could walk from their caves without death falling upon them.
I saw this as my duty, but I immorally killed an honorable creature, and sealed the fate of many in the future, as he will forever discard honor for revenge. When the trolls are released from their prison years later, they will have lost their ways and become savage and brutal. I have doomed Ashbury with the enimity for hundreds of years to come.
As I finish this account, my Gwendolyn has passed into the graveyards and Henry is ready to take up the mantle of leadership. Old they think me on my death bed, but I drink this poison with the intention of punishing myself for the crimes I have committed. I deserve, but the Duchy I forged survives ever still.
Among the documents found in the Bardic College recently include what scholars believe to be the last song of Oliver Songbringer:
Wearing faces that are not our own
Only to cry at one lost chance
Hoping to live but dying alone
Remember that I loved fiercely
A flame within time dreamed
Carry through life peacefully
What was was as it seemed
Old was the pain caused with lies
A shattered spirit this duchy built
Lingering guilt that never dies
For crimes over which blood was spilt
Lurid decisions plague my heart
Dishonor of wrongs cloud my sleep
Everlasting devastation for my lands
My actions themselves shall ever speak
The apocalypse comes 12 decades hence
For the bat, hammer, and the dove
Nothing shall matter when I return
Without the tender touch of Azura's love
As most citizens of Ashbury are now well aware, time has been changed, with some surprising results. As this issue was going to press, investigating adventurers outside of Reeves uncovered a copy of a strange paper called the Post Life Times which contained the following article, which we feel covers the events of the strange incident, but from a different viewpoint than which our gentle readers may be accustomed:
by Forgenair Ghoulgroomer
During a recent excursion to the continent of Avalon, several lesser lords attempted to locate the Talon Scrolls for beloved Jhivantane. For added muscle, they were granted permission from Prince Jomor to utilize the Elder Lord Oracaax to unleash upon the living fools should they not properly respect the power of Jhivantane. Several lesser lords managed to gather several pieces of information but were unable to solidify (please excuse the term vampiric citizens) their successes and recover the Scrolls for Jhivantane.
The Talon Scrolls, for those unaware, are a collection of ritual magics, prophecies, and sources of information invaluable to any serious scholar. They were last known to be used over a hundred years ago in Avalon in the lands known now as Ashbury.
On the evening of July the 3rd, the heroic and well-known cabal of necromantic adventurers calling themselves the Sorcerous Six split up to conduct various duties in recovering the Talon Scrolls. In addition to obtaining information about the Scrolls, they arrived for this decade's meeting of the Millennia Club -- a harmless poker game in which necromantic beings existing over one thousand years are asked to attend. Unfortunately most undead citizens of Jhivantane do not qualify but due to our active politics, High Lord Jomor graciously sent the Six as his emissaries to the game.
The game was scheduled to have been hosted by the liche Mourna, but reports came in that one man managed to destroy this beloved liche, and increasing concern has developed that Ashbury as well as Ravenholt are becoming increasingly dangerous for honest necromancers and cuddly creatures of chaos. (While Jhivantane particularly looks forward to the hope that Chaos will eventually become legal in the lands known as Evendarr, we do our absolute best to support those individuals who carry on the dark arts and are forced to live in hiding for fear of persecution by the servants of the tyrannical forces of Order.)
At the Millennia Club meeting, several influential attendees appeared, including the dreaded ancient vampire Loscarnos De Morganna. In addition to his defacto hosting status (as you all know, after leaving Jhivantane years ago Morganna traveled to Avalon to create his own domain), Morganna is thought to have looked forward to the beloved reunion with his wife-during-life Strykna whom he had not seen in many years.
The reunion was by all reports endearing. Strykna has taken special interest in gypsies around the world in an effort to find the true source of vampirism. Her hatred of gypsy enemy Angelica is well known, and most likely sourced from the nefarious days of the vampire wars.
Another being calling itself Eldric also appeared at the meeting. Clearly this being is not of the predetermined millennia of existence, but perhaps the strange weapon that it wielded is of the correct age. Eldric spent most of the game arguing about some adventuring group calling themselves the Shield of Vendamor. Even Morganna is rumored to have given him a wide berth; however for most of the card game Eldric was rumored to be bickering with Morganna for the location of these Shield people.
During the game, Oracaax was placed upon a funeral slab for all to see. Some of the attendees questioned this action, but Morganna merely smiled.
Morganna's typical humor was also demonstrated by the fact that the entire game being held in front of the Ashbans within the safe confines of Lord Jomor's personal S.O.L.D. transport. Many of our artificer watchers will recall that the S.O.L.D. system was completed last year, and all burrowing beasts have been successfully put into place. When the beast is at rest, a permanent circle of power is in place, protecting the transport from any being below Dragon status.
Several Ashbans managed to gain entry to the game and pester the ancients with all sorts of questions, among them beings named Azrael, Kurgan, and Robert Oakwood. Perhaps the most annoying of them all was the former undead emperor Ichorax, cursed by the order flunkies of Ashbury to retain his mortal form. It is unanswerable why Ichorax has not died of old age but rumors have it that a group of Ashbans at one time possessed his bottle and foolishly sold it away for 75 Evendarrian gold pieces. With its existence still intact, perhaps he still is able to survive in some strange way.
Ichorax managed to change the simple poker game into something far more interesting by stating that he knew the location of Oliver Songbringer's Talon Scrolls and would part with the information for the highest reward. Most of the undead simply laughed at him, but sources say they took greater interest when the Ashbans gathered outside of the S.O.L.D. started negotiating with him!
To prove his claim with Morganna, he presented a time travel scroll to the vampire, who promptly read it and then destroyed it. It is not known how Ichorax gained access to this scroll and if it was in fact from the Talon Scrolls.
After revealing the supposed location of the Talon Scrolls to Morganna, Ichorax was ordered to be driven from the Burrowing Beast, to be freed amongst the Ashbans! We imagine that to be a fate worse than life, as he was hunted and assumed killed by the frenzied slaves of the Judgeratt!
After banishing Ichorax to his doom, Morganna promptly used the scroll and disappeared, assumedly somewhere into the past to obtain the Talon Scrolls.
Those remaining then spoke to several of the Ashbans, some of whom were chosen to serve as our intermediaries in the near future. The rest of the Sorcerous Six in attendance -- Ghastly Grim, Greygaunt the Artificer, and Strykna -- began to "test" the Ashbans by unleashing a series of undead troops to gauge the strength of the Ashbans. After the first few waves of fodder it was clear that the Ashbans really were not much of a threat, and our heroes began to mingle with the unfortunate living citizens of Evendarr and communicate with them.
Things grew very heated in some instances but in general the Ashbans proved cordial and kind, leading some to conclude that perhaps not all Metabs are bad.
One of the conflicts with the Metabs came from Grim choosing to possess a magical weapon obtained on the field of battle. Apparently out of nowhere a baronial assassin attempted to kill Lord Grim in an effort to retrieve the weapon. Calling itself Hanson, it was soon joined by several others. Without his honor guard, Lord Grim was forced to retreat to the beast but managed to retain the enchanted blade. The Baronial Court that attacked Grim is apparently called Trollhome and reports state that they are the representatives responsible for attempting to eliminate our troll allies in Ashbury.
It is likely that these Trollhome baronials (all which carry magic weapons we are told) have slaughtered hundreds of honest well meaning troll allies along with our necromantic volunteers. Once it was apparent that Grim intended to keep the weapon, they changed their tune, became very conciliatory, and began negotiations for the return of the sword.
While these negotiations were taking place, it was clear that our nobles were given cordial hospitality, although an attack on Strykna by a creature calling itself Kelial was met with an appropriate action, and his death was well deserved. The Six then left in the S.O.L.D.
And where were the other two members of the Six during all of this?
Ystus the fabled Black Bard was apparently on his own quest for the Talon Scrolls. Approaching several of the more musically inclined citizens, Ystus convinced them that he was a Bardic Scholar from their minor college and was looking for a way to unearth the lost verses of a song created by Oliver Songbringer. Ystus lead his pupils on a merry chase across the city, uncovering each line by singing the verse in some specific area (a clue was hidden within the lyrics themselves) and something in the environment would respond.
Those who helped him in his quest including local Ashbans Kelsea, Selina, Daniel, Draeth, Tara, Brynn and Rake. They were later joined by others calling themselves Daphne and Gladius.
At the grave of Oliver Songbringer's mother Laura, singing a verse caused her ghost to appear and sing the next verse. A mermaid appeared when one verse was sung at a specific bend in the river. At the arch way near an amphitheater and audible glamour sang a verse. In a tree within the largest field in Ashbury a dryad was supposed to sing, but the adventurers learned that it was cut down and the local pub built out of it. Apparently the spirit of the Dryad still rested within the boards of the structure and it sang a haunting response to the singing of Ystus and his disciples.
The song was consummated in an amazing display where a box allegedly with the Talon Scrolls in it was supposed to appear. Ashbans sang in mass, greedily waiting for the scrolls to appear, when a strange mist appeared and the entire city was impenetrable for a radius of two miles for a duration of over a day. Ystus cared little it seemed for this problem, as his goal was not to obtain the scrolls but to win a bet with Morganna -- he simply had to solve the riddle which had perplexed the Dragon Mage for years.
It is not known what Ystus actually won in his successful uncovering of the Lost Song of Oliver, but it is most likely one of Morganna's fabled necromantic weapons or at least hundreds of lesser undead to add to Ystus' "Chorus of the Damned." Personally, those of us who have attended his concerts wish he had the scrolls instead.
Some of Ystus' other duties while vacationing included arbitrating a dispute for our allies from the assembled clans of the Red Mountain. The Red Mountain clans for the uninformed is an assembly of powerful humanoid tribes banded together under the King Lovinar the Undying. Lovinar, a powerful gnoll, has recently joined our ranks of the non-breathing due to several treaties that Ystus solidified; however problems have arisen among his three living sons Manavat, Vocantor, and Tirinj. The three sons have not yet passed Lovinar's dangerous tests of adulthood.
Arbitrating with the members of the Red Mountain's council, Ystus devised several opportunities to acquire the head of a permanently dead gorbe within the borders of Ashbury. The three sons came to Ashbury with minute honor guards to attempt to obtain the head of one of the local sarr.
Strangely enough, all three proved unsuccessful. Manavat, tied to the Code of Chivalry of Evendarr for some reason we cannot fathom, challenged several sarr to duels. He was defeated twice before he turned his back on this outdated and foolish set of principles, apparently mainly due to his assassination at the hands of the aforementioned Trollhome baronials.
Vocantor the Pikeman was thought to possess the best chance because he led an elite force against the Ashbans, but he was killed once before withdrawing to an S.O.L.D. for reinforcements.
The failure of these two brothers is a great blow to the prestige of the gnolls who led the Red Mountain, but mysteriously Tirinj the third son failed to reappear at the S.O.L.D transport. Likely he is still somewhere in Ashbury. A hopeless addict to Hallucinoid elixirs that his father had banned in his realm, this leader of kobold assassins and gnoll alchemists is likely sleeping off a stupor in some alleyway.
In any event, there seems to be trouble within the ranks of the Red Mountain, as several orcs attempted to acquire Enslavement antidotes for their leaders who are enslaved to the Red Mountain cause. While fighting continues among various factions of the Red Mountain, several leaders were unenslaved despite the Ashbans slaughtering most of these emissaries. They have lost a valuable ally should the Red Mountain return to Ashbury some day in the future.
Ystus has much work ahead of him as a negotiator if we intend to utilize the massive power that is the Red Mountain. Ystus also has much work to do if he intends to remain a Lord, as Prince Jomor does not accept failure lightly. One Ashban biata named Kelsea apparently was quoted to have an interest in shoving Ystus' hat up his anal area, and many here would love to see that.
The other strangely absent individual from the Millennia Club gathering seemed to be Chimaera. As many individuals in Jhivantane know, Chimaera easily falls in love -- and woe be the bachelor she loves. This time however, she became enamored with Oracaax! Apparently she could look past Oracaax's endless droning for his long dead wife M'leina in some vain hope that she could win his affections. Why someone would endlessly pine over someone who endlessly sleeps is beyond most objective observers.
Of all of the dangerous things that happened, the healing of Oracaax is perhaps the biggest news story in a hundred years. It all begins around Chimaera's goal to figure out how to speak to her new boytoy. Apparently damned to be separated in spirit and body, Oracaax was cursed by a relative after his wife abandoned him many hundreds of years ago.
As you all know, Oracaax has been dormant for most of the time, but those artificers love to experiment on those hapless responseless individuals, so why not on Oracaax? If you are a lord you can take Oracaax out for a spin just like a library book! Simply cast an Awaken spell and run for the hills until he is either beaten into a gaseous pulp or hit with a Sleep spell. Most observers are not aware of this strange "curse" upon him, but the curse seems to revolve around finding his ex-wife M'leina and apologizing for his behavior. It seems a little simplistic but rather than plague you with 4th century nonsense, I'll get to the point: When he's awake all he does is scream for his wife M'leina. When he's asleep he just lays there in dream.
Chimaera, knowing this, was looking for a means to speak with him. In any case, The Shawl of Final Regrets fell into the possession of our adversaries in the Submerged City of Scythera directly below Ashbury. We all know what happens to Chimaera when she hits water right? She turns into an ancient mariner right before your eyes. (Well, she is the captain of one of Prince Jomor's ships, isn't she?)
Chimaera has been conducting a war with the Submerged City for years, with she possessing the Serpent Gem and them possessing the Shawl. Her conquest of the Silver Pike Citadel should have put that all to rest (excuse the pun) but just as she was about to put the big undead hex on Scythera herself and bring the undead Medusa under our control, in strolled the Ashbans to trash the whole thing! They bargained with Scythera, crashed the party and killed the soldiers, and stole away with the Shawl.
The populous has since united under Scythera with the recovery of her gem, and now all chaos has broken loose on the waves of the underground seas, setting us back at least a decade. Luckily, Chimaera escaped with a dramatic swan dive off the Citadel and arrived just in time to witness the complete and utter debacle between Greygaunt and Grim.
Back to Oracaax though. For yucks, Grim released Oracaax during Vocantor's final push into adulthood on Thursday afternoon and the Ashbans actually found M'leina's grave! Leading him to the grave, his spirit merged with the body and he dug her up! With romance at its highest, he dragged her decaying corpse off into the distance demanding the Shawl so that he could apologize and they could rot happily ever after. . .after he beat the Six into a pulp for dragging him around like a doll.
Oracaax came to Ashbury and demanded the Shawl. Daniel Star convinced him that he would help, and in order to save his puny hide, worked with those Trollhome Metabs to give the Shawl back. Oracaax then chased the Sorcerous Six all the way back to Birkmire. But I have yet to properly illustrate the rest of the story!
Between Oracaax's departure with M'leina and the recovery of the Shawl, Greygaunt put one of his crazy inventions to work! Yes we have all heard of the C.R.Y.S.A. Crystal and its ability to store the spirits of its victims into it and create little necromantic yigglings in their place. Although this minor facsimile had a capacity of 21, Greygaunt managed to get 17 Ashbans into it and they scared the flesh right off the Metabs! Among those found yiggling around Ashbury were beings calling themselves Azura, Hawkwing, Justice, Northstar, Petra, and Ta'wanÆ. Grim agreed to help of course in capturing them for fuel for the machine, but little did Greygaunt know that Grim was trying to overload the crystal and recreate a minor mound of Frezvillar!
Frezvillar we pay homage to you, lord of the ghouls! Grim needed a powerful necromantic explosion to push his mound into massive undead creation mode (It is said that the mound would have created at least 1000 ghouls before it exhausted itself), so he was purposely trying to get Ashbans either to stupidly wander out into the woods in small groups, threatening to detonate some kind of chaos bomb if they grouped up or bash them when they weren't looking, so he could overload the crystal.
Of course he hid the reformation points for the Yigglings in pretty obvious areas, but not enough that Greygaunt would suspect! Grim, being the overconfident being we all know, pushed it a but by intercepting a lot of messenger zombies and redirecting them into town so that the Ashbans would push into the woods and be more likely to get dragged out to the Crystal.
With the uncoded messages in Ashban hands, it was merely a matter of time until they found the Crystal. Unfortunately when the Ashbans made their big push towards the lesser mound, all of Grim's Goon Squad's were bringing in fresh recruits for the crystal and the Ashbans fought a concentration of the enemy.
Ashbans pushed into the mound area and found the entire area gassed trapped (sucks to have a metabolism, eh?) while they were waging an ongoing battle with the ghouls, ghasts, and wights. Using his ghoul squads (complete with homunculi, will-o-wisps, and a few ghoul lords) to good affect, Grim retired to the Crystal to watch the fun. Grim also sent in some minor ghouls to go get the incapacitated Ashbans from the fight to fill up the crystal. Perhaps the most amusing part was that Grim doctored some of the letters to make the Ashbans believe that the ghouls were immune to confining spells. Everyone knows Ghoul Grease only offers minor resistance to earth spells to better prevent other people from controlling your house pets! (With Chimaera's failure to conquer Scythera, there probably won't be enough Medusa blood around to make any more anytime soon, so expect prices to be around 12 zombies per jar.)
Ashbans got to the crystal in the nick of time, and managed to kill Grim and Greygaunt's kobold apprentice Grunsack (he's a non-corporeal so has to rely on unskilled labor) but Chimaera and our favorite Artificer escaped. By merely shattering the crystal the Ashbans released their comrades and perhaps the most memorable experiments in Jhivantane history were foiled.
It's a good thing we still have the Six (or should I say Four) around for amusement, as things were getting a little dead around here. With the regaining of the Shawl of Final Regrets, the Ashbans have turned Oracaax against us and he has trashed several of our estates and tombs. Prince Jomor himself strode out to meet him in the marshes outside of Birkmire and was forced to destroy him with a few well placed blows. Now I guess he'll be able to sleep for eternity eh? Actually whether the Prince merely imprisoned him or killed him is the hottest bloodbar topic in the swamps these days.
For their incompetence in allowing this, Prince Jomor has confiscated the bottles of the Six and placed them under a "grounding" for a least 18 months because of all of this lunacy. Chimaera now spends her days lamenting something called "Modi," constantly fretting that Scythera will turn him into a birdbath statue or something. Greygaunt has been reassigned to the Son of Fangthorn project, but his lack of hands is clearly slowing down progress on the aging device. Grim is grim and he is spending his days writing all sorts of poems about someone named Morlox, assumedly a rival Ashban poet. Ystus is tuning up his chorus of course and we imagine that Prince Jomor will either obliterate him with his weapon or of course let him off grounding early when the chorus begins once again.
On a less humorous note, an obituary will be in our next issue dedicated in the memory of Strykna who is believed to have been staked at the hands of two Ashbans. Since Morganna has disappeared somewhere into the past, he has not been informed of his wife's demise, but citizens are asked to please spend a moment remembering her generosity, her bloody smile, and her way of pissing off Angelica that amused us so.
When the Shadow Mage returns from his adventures through history and finds his last connection to his pre-unlife gone, we will write many articles about the nasty things he does to those two poor unfortunates that killed her.
Until next month's issue, see you in the bogs by the illumination of the corpse lights.
(Oliver Songbringer's "Last Song")
Chorus:
And though it be five hundred year then,
Still my song shall make all clear then,
And the power will be brought near then
To keep our land forever free.
Verses:
Find the place where the players roam there
Built with no walls and with no dome there.
'Neath the roof bring my music home there,
And the echo shall answer thee.
Take the music that you are bringing
To the one who first taught me signing.
In her sleep she will hear it ringing;
In her dreams she shall answer thee.
With the stones of my pillow near you
Sing these words in peace without fear; you
Will prevail, for the stones will hear you
And their voices shall answer thee.
In the depths find the maidens playing,
Never from flowing sky-tears straying,
Sing and hear what their song is saying,
For their music shall answer thee.
Near the place where the echo started
Mount the steps to what joins the parted
Sing from where span center's started;
The song's echo shall answer thee.
Making Gwendolyn's Field a glade there
Stands her great ancient oak displayed there.
Stand and sing to it in its shade there
And its branches will answer thee.
Look your cares and your pains to cure there;
Sing to life in its form most pure there,
To what makes sanctuary sure there
And its power shall answer thee.
Amidst Gwendolyn's Field array now
On July's full-hand counted day now:
Two-score sing at the height of day now
And the quest's end shall sing to thee.
Past and future both and none now,
Boldly done deeds and deeds undone now.
Truth and falsehood may be as one now
That the Talon Scrolls you may see.
The estate of Capulus' "Festival of Cups," which was attended by many of Ashban's greatest adventurers and noted nobles, turned out to be less festive than planned due to the presence of a gnoll army and a vampire's treachery. These distractions effectively cancelled the celebrations.
The gnolls were attacking the town in search of a "Black Wizard" who had been experimenting on the gnolls, causing strange mutations. The Ashbans fought the gnolls over and over until both sides eventually figured out that they had a common enemy.
The "Black Wizard" turned out to be Serinal Mazrin, Guildmaster of the Capulus Mages' Guild and a former classmate of Guildmistress Shalizar of the Ashbury Mages' Guild. It was also discovered that he was an undead after he was downed by some trolls that were eventually killed by Squire Florin, Templeton, and Francis.
It was later discovered that Serinal was connected to the group known as "The Consortium" -- an evil conclave of ritual killers.
The group is believed to be responsible for the death of the wild elf BrightHawk who was killed and given a Forget-it potion to recall the phrase "I died for a higher purpose." Later deaths of other local citizens who resurrected uttering the same phrase caused a bit of an alarm that was amplified by the Duchess' own death and resurrection with the same result. This enraged the Duke who immediatley ordered the arrest of all of the most prominent citizens in Capulus, throwing them in jail and leaving the town under the control of Sir Angus.
Undaunted, early Sunday morning, Serinal and his followers tried it again. A Circle of Power was placed around the inn that housed Baron Konrad and his court, and a Destroy Magic ritual was in the process of being conducted when Lupiticus (who had been transformed into an iron golem and needed no sleep) discovered the intruders and woke the household. The Ward was lowered and Sir Algar attacked the ritual caster, thus causing a massive backlash resulting in the deaths of all within the circle, apparently including Serinal and his evil followers.
Many Ashbans and Capulans are still piecing together what this whole thing had to do with a large fish-headed creature known as Zanser-bahn who was known to be an enemy of The Consortium. Apparently Zanserbahn was imprisoned by a group of wild elves some 700 years ago for crimes against Tyrra. This was confirmed by local kirgani and barbarians from the Eagle Clan. Baron Justice and his court discovered Zanserbahn's hiding place and led the adventurers present to his tomb where a fight ensued where the creature was dispatched with relative ease.
Capulus has since been returned to a state of near normality, but many of those in the Consortium have been executed and banished from the area.
While Ashbury's adventurers traveled to the past to fight against Fangthorn yet again, the gypsies of Ashbury also used the trip as an opportunity to learn more of their foe Angelica. While in the past, the gypsies met again with an incarnation of Fate, the mysterious power that many say is responsible for creating the gypsy race. In the past they learned of an artifact of their people and how to retrieve it in the future.
When the gypsies returned to the present, they organized a large group to travel to a circle of power where this sword was trapped within. The gypsies took many of the townsfolk and travelers from Ravenholt with them. When they arrived at the circle they found it guarded by Angelica's undead forces. The forces formed a line to fight against them, and knew a difficult fight lay ahead as Angelica's black horned minion stepped to the fore of the undead. While the two forces were facing off against each other Findrago, Hawkwing, and Daniel Star snuck around to the back of the circle and stealthily made their way to it. When he reached the circle's edge, Findrago was recognized within, where he grabbed the sword and ran. The gypsies and their allies at this point made an unorganized retreat and several of them were cut down from behind.
When the forces reorganized, Northstar and Dalar from Ravenholt retrieved Petra's fallen body and got a Life spell to her but Kylara was not so lucky and ended up resurrecting from the encounter.
Just how this sword will help the gypsies is unknown. It quite obviously has a damage aura upon it and it has been heard to speak. Perhaps it is an advisor to the gypsies in their time of need.
Later the evening that the sword was retrieved, Angelica and several of her minions came into town to speak to the gypsies about their taking of the sword. Though they did not attack any townsfolk, other than two gypsies who they allowed to be Lifed, everyone who saw them retreated from them and hid behind Wards. They discussed many things with the townsfolk including possible trades of magic items and components. The one called Jarl even entered the Dragon's Lair Ward and talked to those within for a while alone. They left taking many of the wandering undead of the town with them to serve as new minions.
The Royal Academy of Arcane Arts and Sciences, in an effort to repair its reputation of keeping its expansive ritual knowledge to itself, has once again announced the existence of new rituals recently discovered or created. Dean Rorik Ballistrane has sent written correspondence to all Royal Guilds and independent merchant houses outlining the new rituals and some changes to existing ones, of which the Ashbury Times has acquired a copy.
New rituals announced for both schools include Render Indestructible Improved, a higher level version of the already known one year duration Render Indestructible ritual, which will render an item permanently indestructible. Also included are the recent inventions in both schools of a Minor Channel Spell and Major Channel Spell ritual (commonly referred to as "Spell Strike"), which allow the caster to enchant once per day a weapon with up to 3rd level spells and up to 6th level spells respectively. The Channel Spell ritual already in existence is the only way to enchant any battle magic spell into a weapon.
Changed rituals for both schools include Audible Projection, which has been altered through much research to last for an entire year as opposed to once ever. Existing Audible Projection ritual scrolls will still cause the ritual cast to last once ever, the modified Audible Projection scroll with its new duration will be the only one sold through the Royal Academy and most likely all other organized sources from now on. Due to this modification, the Audible Projection Improved ritual which lasts 28 days will no longer be sold as well and the ritual libraries will no longer identify the components for them, though it can still be cast from those scrolls in existence.
Also changed in duration are the many varieties of the Warder Glyph ritual, which will last one year as opposed to five days.
As with Audible Projection, existing ritual scrolls will still cause the ritual cast to last five days, but the modified Warder Glyph scrolls with their new duration will be the only ones sold from now on.
Finally, the Royal Academy has announced that it has located through their not-so-periodic inventories of past research documents abbreviated notes taken by Oliver Songbringer regarding the volumes of rituals now referred to as the Talon Scrolls.
Although the ritual scrolls and information about them has been lost for over a century, the notes do reveal enough information about the components they used to allow researchers in ritual libraries to at least identify the components as belonging to the Talon Scrolls. The Royal Academy did warn everyone that without the actual ritual scrolls they cannot be certain of the component information being valid and are asking all researchers to pass that warning along to their customers.
Sources at local Royal Guilds have noted to the Ashbury Times that the announcements this past year from the Royal Academy have generated an increased market for buying and selling ritual scrolls. To fill this need, some of the contacts they use to locate the scrolls are offering to travel further and to more dangerous places to find the scrolls being requested, but for an increased fee which can amount to as much as sixty gold a ritual scroll! Already at least a dozen high ranking members of Royal Guilds across Evendarr have resigned their positions to devote their time to this more profitable career. Rumor has it that the Royal Academy was planning on banning these freelancers from selling to Royal Guilds, but dropped the issue when at least one member of their own faculty resigned to do the same.
The new and modified ritual scrolls are immediately available for purchase and the well paid freelancers have made it known their services are available to the Royal Guilds and independent merchant houses for any scrolls at all, regardless of how long people have been waiting for them.
The mischievous faerie creature known as Dylanjeer first made his face known to people from Ashbury when he helped some adventurers in their quests concerning Fangthorn's sons. After offering them advice, he later proclaimed that they owed him favors. Earlier this month, he tried to collect.
He traveled the town and handed out cursed tarot cards to those who owed him -- as well as others who he either disliked or took a shining to. These spirit-linked cards carried with them specific curses unique to each card, and the recipients were forced to wear the cards around their necks.
Local fortunetellers had noted in the past month that their tarot decks had been unusual lately and that fortunes were not as accurate as usual. Marlin even found that to his eyes, many of the cards faded as he looked at them. By the time Dylanjeer came to town, the cards were completely blank.
Dylanjeer's cards, however, were bright and colorful. He handed them out randomly and some of the recipients fared better than others.
Being cards of fortune, they often found their most obvious targets.
For example, Mages' Guildmistress Shalizar chose the Stars (making her want to be outdoors at night), Robert Oakwood chose Death, (which required him to have two Life spells whereas one would normally do), and Lude Narcisse chose the Adversary (which made him hate and distrust all humans).
Others were not as obvious. Findrago was cursed to be under a constant hallucinoid; Petra was cursed to obey any instruction from a woman; Emerald was cursed to be extremely jealous of any woman who spoke to Lude; Varag was cursed to be killed by a falling meteor; and Dream was cursed to smell bad and (fortunately) avoid crowds.
Others forced to wear the cards included Lord Agnar, Azura, Calis, Derek Dreamweaver, Lord Hanson, Dame Kittery, Manx, Squire Morgan, and Morlox.
It has been theorized that the cards are actually living embodiments of Fortune and that Dylanjeer somehow managed to get a hold of the original deck, thus tainting all other decks and causing the turmoil. This theory seemed stronger when The Fool appeared.
Dylanjeer apparently let the Fool loose and did not require him to be "hung around someone's shoulders." This creature was walking around town, taunting people with the cards, and teasing them about their predicament.
When the adventurers of Ashbury found themselves in the past, they hoped that they were freed of Dylanjeer even though the curses remained; however, Dylanjeer soon appeared, complaining that it had taken him over 250 years to find his victims. "And there you were, hiding in the past all along!"
In his arms, he held Kylara's baby, now fey marked, who he claimed he saved from marauding trolls.
Dylanjeer and the Fool took their victims aside and stated that if they were properly entertained, they would remove the cards. The adventurers did what they could with no time to prepare. Manx told a story. Petra stood on her head. Others staged fights or sang songs.
Eventually all had their cards removed. Tarot decks all over Ashbury are now responding as normal again -- except when asked questions about the mischievous fey known as Dylanjeer.
In a never before seen show of solidarity, the major criminal organizations of Ashbury -- including the Fist, the Dockside Thieves' Guild, The Port Frederick Thieves' Guild, The Black Masks, and The Sons of the Dragon -- organized jailbreaks of immense proportions.
Across the entire Duchy, people were placed inside the various ducal prisons and riots erupted, allowing for prisoner escapes and chaos within the fortified walls. Covert teams from the various organizations broke in on the day the Wards were to be recast and attempted to release members of their organizations.
With aid from many of the Baronial Courts and the adventuring groups of Ashbury a large number of these riots were quelled and several of the special prisoners were prevented from escaping. However, all captured members of the Dockside Thieves' Guild managed to escape and activity from that group is now at a record high.
Linduria: Noted pacifist Wild Elf leader Eriol recently held a protest at a local armorsmith shop where the proprieter had long refused to do business with his people. "They never pay in coin," complained Teril Belayson, an Amani who was once a Ranger before he retired. "And then they complain when I refuse to repair their armor for free when they run through the woods destroying it!" Eriol and his followers once again used the rally to call for Kirgani representation in the Wold, and to plea for peace between the two peoples of the Forest. No injuries were reported but many Amani were complaining about the presence of the "painted" ruining their neighborhood.
Port Frederick: Merchants preparing for Storm Day had a rude awakening recently when it was discovered that much of the foodstuff in this small town had been poisoned. There are currently no suspects, and safe food is being rushed to the town in time for the celebration.
South Point: Apparently in response to Amani Rangers destroying one of her minions in South Point, the dreaded gypsy enemy Angelica led a devastating attack against this gentle vacation community. From within the building where the Rangers attacked, Angelica rifted in her forces and let loose a horde of Barghests. Her forces decimated the Ranger contingent and the Barghests left a devastation in their paths such as has not been seen since the sacking of Peppercorn by the forces of Mourna. Among those dead in the attack were Mason Sharebrook and former Baron Eridan Talerane who both make their home in this community.
Thrommel: Tension in this biata-heavy town is high as questions about Baron Justice's proclamation about "killing biata" sparks rumors faster than they can be killed. Many humans in the area have reported that anti-human discrimination is at a peak, but because no one is quite certain where the rumor originated or why the Baron would suddenly declare this, confusion rules the day. Similar situations have been reported in Hopewell and Hrin Merik.
Trollsgate: Unpopulated areas of Trollsgate have long been a haunted shell of dwarven ruins. Trollsgate citizens have often been harassed by troll war parties from the Tower Hills, but the fortress at Trollsgate has never been reinhabited. Recently however, several citizens in surrounding villages have investigated only to encounter large sable trolls, black skinned and powerful. Although no true confrontations have occurred with these creatures, several inquisitive individuals have been gruffly escorted away from the ruins. They apparently call themselves Aspect Warriors of the Sunless Empire, in service of Emperor Makalnar. It is readily apparent that these subsurface denizens intend some long term business. Many dwarven citizens are violently angry despite their abandonment of the fortifications, complaining that trolls have no place among the honored dead of the dwarves.
There are numerous issues involving the Code of Chivalry that are important enough to deserve commentary; however, this discussion involves two points that have been debated thoroughly.
The first topic is the constant deliberation of whether it is more important to follow the letter or the spirit of the Code. It is agreed that the Code serves as a guideline and that each noble must interpret its principles carefully; however, all individuals have the ability to recognize between right and wrong, good and evil. Observing the purpose, or "spirit" of the Code may be simpler than following its specific edicts because one may change the interpretation of the provision to fit a variety of situations. Thus, ideally one should strive to diligently abide by the letter of the Code; however, it is recognized that in the real world, issues are rarely clearly divided.
The second topic involves the discussion of memorizing the Code of Chivalry. While it is recognized that a squire is not required to memorize the Code, such dedication is an excellent testimony to a squire's devotion and understanding of the Code. In addition, it is much easier to allow the Code to guide one's actions in a difficult situation if one knows the exact wording of the specific edict that applies to the situation. Squires should, therefore, know the Code "by heart."
Comments on these subjects are welcome.
Sir Ivan Drake
by Sue D'Onym
What a busy month this has been! There is a lot of gossip to share with you, so let's begin!
It seems that more and more people are refusing to use the Ashbury Healers' Guild to resurrect because they do not trust Guildmistress Daphne Greene (You never see Baron Justice or anyone from the court of Trellheim in there). Daphne refused to let a sarr complete Sshran Ka'taan's resurrection and her lack of knowledge of sarr society led to him going into a coma! She refused to let gypsy Dax help with Kylara's resurrection (although she did allow gypsy Javier to do it; Dax, of course, took exception to his treatment and cursed Daphne to say she is a coward after everything she says), and of course a few months ago kicked the biata Zatarina out in the middle of a resurrection. Perhaps she just has decided that it is best if people resurrect elsewhere -- less paperwork for her!
Sshran unfortunately died again a few weeks later when he and his companions Taariq, Azia, Brightstone, and Raiden resurrected in the Healer's Guild with the memory of having been killed by Galoran. None of them however had ever met Galoran before, so they all gave different accounts of what he looked like. Can you say "Forget-it-Well"? There are no suspects at the moment, but the adventurers are on the lookout for their items that were stolen.
The gypsies are now blaming Hanson for the likely destruction of their race at the hands of their enemy, Angelica. Hanson as you know destroyed Morganna's beloved Strykna -- who also hated Angelica. The gypsies were hoping to pit the two undead against each other, figuring no matter who won, everyone else would come out a winner. Hanson would have nothing of this, citing laws against consorting with undead. Of course, when he consorted with Mourna in order to later destroy her, he got a knighthood out of it.
Needless to say, while Hanson had Strykna inside the Dragon Flagon's Ward, who would show up outside the Flagon but Angelica herself along with her minions to taunt the gypsies with their certain destruction. While Petra, Smith and Quentin were outside in need of Life spells, Hanson refused to allow the Ward to be let down (he didn't want Strykna to escape) to let Ta'wane out to Life her fallen friends. Dax was outside and was able to get to Petra in time to Life her, and she ran for the Dragon's Lair Guildhall. Both Smith and Quentin however were forced to resurrect. (Smith had earlier been jokingly ordered to "stop dying" by members of the court of Trellheim who have spent many Life spells keeping the feisty dwarf alive during major battles.)
Anyway, not happy with merely killing off only one race, the Trellheimers have also declared that all biata (except for their traveling companion Azreal) should be killed for treason. No one heard any exception being made for our own beloved Duke Bryan, who is currently with Duchess Mara at King Mykel's coronation in Evendarr.
On the lighter side of gossip, the gypsies were finally given something to celebrate, as they got together to hold their annual Waymeet at the Dragon's Flagon. Gypsies from all over came to enjoy the celebration which lasted far into the wee hours of the morning. Although there was almost a scene when it turned out that someone let in some members of the Court of Trellheim that weren't invited, particularly convicted gypsy-killer Modi, the Rom dropped it when Modi claimed he was only there to see his sister Natasha. How they suddenly became related, however, is anybody's guess.
It was at the Waymeet that it was made public that, by unanimous consent, Rasq the Sarr is now the official Gypsy Toy. Drinking, dancing and much pudding was shared by many.
I hope Mason isn't the jealous type, since his recent wife Ta'wane was seen rubbing the horns of Dream the Mystic Wood elf, petting all of her various sarr friends, and eventually leaving for the evening with a gypsy visitor to Ashbury named Dimitri.
It seems that Findrago the gypsy's upcoming date with Kelsea the biata has caused quite a stirring among the biata in Ashbury. It was said that upon hearing the news, Kelial was livid and Hagen wanted to challenge Findrago to honor combat!
If you're wondering why Lupiticus is getting sour looks from his fellow MWEs lately, it might have something to do with the fact that Lupi had himself turned into an iron golem a while ago. Imagine, a Mystic Wood elf who would rather have power than pleasure! That's what happens when you hang around with the New Improved Ash Forest, I guess.
The news around Diron is that Unrok was in need of a Life spell when Shalizar found out she's going to have another half-orc. Since they named the first child Gold, I assume this one will be called Silver? Duchess Mara is going to have to print up new coins to name the kids after if Shalizar keeps going at this rate. But healer Caleb Hand could always be wrong about the race of the unborn child. His specialty is in killing dark elves, not midwifery. Maybe this is part of his training to be a knight? After three years of squirehood, he needs all the help he can get.
Maybe-a-Paladin Ivan Drake has been formally courting Inyanterra the gypsy. So what was he doing emerging from the forest with Natasha early one morning? Meanwhile, wild elves Jonah and BrightHawk have admitted to spending much time alone in the forest, performing "rituals."
And speaking of Ivan, many nobles can't seem to get used to the idea of him suddenly becoming a Paladin, but most of the commoners of Ashbury are ecstatic. As soon they heard, they bombarded him with complaints about various nobles from incidents going back months, and were astounded that Ivan not only listened to them, but actually wrote down all the information and promised to look into the complaints.
The time travel thing is very confusing. It may be a while before we understand it all. Still, it's interesting to see how the folks who bounced backwards may have affected the present. For example, after Oliver Songbringer's tryst with Azura and fight with his wife Gwendolyn over the affair, Manx made the suggestion that perhaps the soon-to-be-Duke should name a field after her as a way to apologize. He liked the idea. Similarly, when a friendly and polite Chessmaster showed up (sans make-up) and stated his desire to play chess but his inability due to the loss of his board, one wiseguy suggested that they divide up the field and have people play the parts of the chess pieces. "What a great idea!" replied Mr. C, as the wiseguy's pals slapped him silly.
Well, that's it for this month. Once more, if it seems that my column has a lot of information about gypsies and commoners and rarely says anything nice about nobles, it is probably because gypsies and commoners write to me and nobles do not, so poor little me only hears and reports one side of the story! If you want to see your name (or your enemy's name) in the News They Don't Want You To Know, you need to keep me informed!
So until next month, remember -- If you can't say something nice about someone, come sit by me.
My father was a merchant as was his father before him and so on. When I decided to follow the same career my father gave me the wise advice "Find a product that is always changing so that your customers keep coming back to buy more." He was referring women's clothing at the time and that's where I made my fortune for many years before becoming an adventurer. But I have recently discovered another product like this making chests of gold for its merchants and better yet, its distribution is so limited that only a select few can control the entire market.
What product am I referring to? Why ritual scrolls of course! These expensive items are controlled by the Royal Guilds and those few merchant houses who bribed the Royal Academy into letting them in on the action. Any adventurer who wants to buy them is at their mercy and little of that is shown for the customer given the large fees. And just when you think you've bought all they have to offer, they suddenly come up with more to sell that they mysteriously didn't know about before. What a gimmick!
What's even worse, you can't use what you've bought unless you have the right components for them. Forget about buying those from the Royal Guilds, they don't sell the only product that makes their money making items useful. The free market is far from that, what adventurer have you met that will actually sell you a component for money? All they want to do is trade for another component because after all, they're at the mercy of the Royal Guilds too.
The crowning touch to this hard lesson of closed markets are these new 'Talon Scrolls', which the Royal Academy aren't even sure exist. Bring a component into any of the Guilds and they tell you it's used for a Talon Scroll they don't know the name or use of. For that volume of information you're charged a silver! Protest and they'll tell you that at least now you know it's a ritual component. As if the fact that this eyeball was preserved in a jar carried by a powerful necromancer wasn't enough to clue me in.
Normally I would say more power to them, they've got an angle no other merchant has and are making a fortune from it. But competition is what makes the consumer, you and I, get a better product for a lower price and right now there's no way anyone can compete. If you agree, join me in boycotting the Royal Guilds and their few merchant house bed partners. Don't buy their ritual scrolls, don't get your components identified, let their storehouses of potions and scrolls fill from lack of sales. Then we shall see the markets truly open up and the customers get what they finally deserve.
Name Withheld for Fear of Retribution
"With the Code as our Shield, we unleash our righteous wrath upon the evil and vile. Our hand wields the hammer and we beat it upon the anvil that is the earth: crushing the brutish, molding the powindah, and forging the Shield of Vendamor."
From the ancient scripts of the Archives of the Shield of Vendamor, Paul Treyad spoke these words, and began the Conquest of the Brutish. We serve as his one true Shield! With these words we still lead the charge of expunging the despicable that oppress the weak and carry out injustice upon the children of the Code. No man or beast is exempt from the Will of the Code. We are the Shield of Vendamor, masters of vengeance long forgotten, and caretakers of the only true Code: The Code of Man.
We have come to Ashbury to pursue our own goals and to gather up the lost children of our past. We seek to unlock the Code from its slumber in the hearts of all Ashbans. We are your shepherds, and we guard the flock from dangers of the night and the impurities within the hearts of the brutish that can only be revealed by the Code of Man.
We have heard rumor of another group of men calling themselves the Shield of Vendamor. Curious as this may be to us, we shall test them, and if they pass, embrace them as lost brothers and offer them the chance to don the furs of the true Shield and travel with their brothers on the Conquest. Forgiveness is tempered only with the light of the Code, and Kanly will be called against those members of this wayward Shield who prove themselves to be brutes hiding from Justice. We are sure they will see the error of their ways and we shall expunge any false teachings from their doctrine; the Shield will once again be the hammer that it once was. . .not a mere glimmer of zealots in the dark. There is much work to be done, I look forward to walking among you again. . .whether it be to punish your spirits or clasp your hand in brotherhood.
Garek Von Montebanque
Regent of the Shield of Vendamor
SALUTATIONS: I wish to thank the benevolent individuals who donated money to the Tower Hills' Charity Drive. Your generosity was overwhelming, enabling the estate's citizens to build a proper school and hospital. I salute your valiancy and admire your altruism. - Sir Radric Hellfax, Lord of the Tower Hills
RIFTMASTER SHARINVAR: I await your return and my continued studies - Minor Rift Apprentice Aloryn.
THERE IS NO TRUTH to the rumor that gypsies or any other race have been banned from the Healers' Guild Circle. All citizen races are welcome at the Healers' Guild (although some individuals may not be). - Daphne
VOTTRAN: I am so very sorry, I hope that I have been forgiven. - Tarabelle
TO THOSE OF THE GORBE: When I return to Ashbury -- which may not be for several months -- I would like to invite all of you to visit me for drinks. - Alyx Attleborough
SMITH: I want to try your game. But maybe we could start with a hobling on my back. - Dax
FREE DETECT MAGICS cast at the Ashbury Mages' Guild every hour on the half hour during Guild hours. (Listen for the bell). Hours are noon - 6 pm and 8 pm - midnight. Magic items Identified, Ritual Components researched, scrolls bought and sold (discounts for large quantities), and Rituals cast. Until further notice, only one Sarr is allowed in the Guild at a time. We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause the lawful citizens of Ashbury.
ASHBURY REGISTRY OF TEACHERS. Referrals for a wide range of skills. Discretion assured. See Prof. Turlough Kuranes.
RAKE: Budi hame bacheche Gorbe ba-dar my ghalb. Bist-yek. Teez my changal dar Esani pust. Asanabi Saket Sawyeh
KONRAD: I hear you were a beautiful baby.
TO ALL OUR ALLIES: It is heartening to know that we have so many friends in Ashbury. We found support even among people we rarely, if ever, have traveled with. I could never express to you the depths of my gratitude. We will not let these threats go unanswered. Thank you. - Selina
WANTED: Ritual components and scrolls; Anyone who wishes to sell them, please contact me. - Anakin
WE ARE DEEPLY GRATEFUL to all the brave and selfless heroes who joined the gypsies on our mission. To assemble such a force without having to hire mercenaries means that all honorable people can stand together when necessary. Do not hesitate to contact us if you are in need. - Petra Varados, Javier de Sousa, and Findrago Malreaver.
ALGAR: You're smart, figure it out.
RASQ: Vashi, parendeh Mard, and Mosafer all need you challah. Think, who's next Gorbe? Stay in town, our future might depend on it. Noghre
TIRED OF BEING ALONE? Want someone you can trust to watch your back? Want to have the feeling you're part of the family? Join the Clan MacMorna. We have no prejudices regarding age, race, or sex. Contact Shawn MacMorna for an interview.
FASHION THIEF: Write to me immediately if you need assistance. Also I have a grey one to replace the brown.
THE ASHBURY MAGES' GUILD is compiling a bestiary for reference by all adventurers. If you are a craftsman who can sketch accurate likenesses of creatures, please see Guildmistress Shalizar for potential employment.
KELIAL VARDIK: Thank you for saving the life of the one who is dearest to my heart. Your kindness will never be forgotten. - BrightHawk
TROM: Shambe shab. Sharab. Mach, mach. Do bare. - Tara
DAPHNE: Come out of your circle and fight with the rest of us. Dax was right. You are a coward.
THANKS to the many who begged us and helped us get safely out of Ashbury and away from Baron Justice's order to kill our race. I owe you my life - Zatarina
ADELAIDE: I would like to speak to you once again. I am the ferret scavenger you spoke with on the 4th. I enjoyed your amusing stories and would like to hear some more. Please stop by the Ducal Manor House and ask for Manx.
WIZARDS OF EVENDARR: The Talon Scroll "Heal Golem" has recently been entrusted to me by the order elementals. Any Wizard interested in using this scroll my contact me at the Tower hill Citadel to make an appointment. Minions of Chaos need not bother making an appointment, you will be denied access to the scroll. - Squire Morgan Sunstar
RECRUITS NEEDED for new Ducal Army company in Ashbury City. Meeting to be held Sat Aug 3, 10 pm in the tavern. Contact Warlord Angus.
TO THOSE SARR and others who insist on sending in incomprehensible Public Notices and Letters to the Editor in their own language: This is a newspaper in the King's tongue. Start your own damn paper if you want to babble to each other. - Eric Woolcott
THE ASHBURY MAGES' GUILD would like to congratulate the following new Apprentice: Rasq Darkmoon Nafud; and the following promotion to Guildsman: Tarquin Xerxes, Checkmate